Reclaim Your Focus & Be Happier: How Tiny Habits Create Big Shifts
When 2024 was coming to an end, a few people asked if I had resolutions for 2025. I do—I’ve had resolutions every year since 2014 when I read The Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin. First published in 2009, Rubin blends research, classical philosophy, and personal anecdotes to explore how intentional habits can increase happiness. A lot of my resolutions are about intentional habits.
Some found Rubin’s tone preachy or overly structured, while others felt her advice leaned too much on lifestyle tweaks rather than deeper emotional or societal issues. Even so, there’s value in her approach. Addressing global issues can often be more effective when rooted in personal reflection and change and if you want to work through deeper emotional issues, a multifaceted approach can be healing—whether that’s therapy, spiritual exploration, physical self-care, creative expression, meditation, or the mindful habit-building strategies Rubin describes.
Rubin highlights how much of our daily behavior is shaped by habit and unconscious routines. Because so much of our thinking and behavior happens automatically, intentional habit formation becomes key to increasing happiness. That’s an important idea, and psychological and neuroscientific research backs it up.
Much of human behavior is governed by the basal ganglia which forms habits through repeated cues and rewards. Over time, this strengthens neural pathways making behaviors automatic. Around 40% of daily actions are habitual rather than deliberate. This means unhelpful patterns can become ingrained if reinforced regularly. Breaking these patterns and building positive ones requires engaging the prefrontal cortex (responsible for decision-making and self-control) and consciously replacing old cues and rewards with new ones.
Rubin’s Resolutions Chart is a simple but useful tool for tracking progress in the endeavor to change habits. You can map out a whole year in advance or choose a theme as each month comes and select specific things to focus on. These might be:
- Resolutions = specific, measurable actions or habits you commit to practicing
- Commandments = guiding principles or overarching life philosophies (e.g., “let it go”)
- Habits of Mind (this one’s mine) = thought patterns to be mindful of (e.g., “curb negative chatter”)
Rubin talks about the power of tracking progress visually—an idea similar to the well-known “Seinfeld strategy.” Jerry Seinfeld reportedly maintained his writing habit by marking an X on a calendar for each day he wrote and the goal was to “not break the chain.” Seeing that visual record creates motivation and momentum.
I’ve been using a Google Sheet to visually track my Resolutions Chart for many years. Every time I find myself following through on a Resolution, etc., I mark an “X” on that day of the month.
Here’s an example:
Even when I fall off for stretches of time, this ritual remains grounding and worthwhile. You can map out themes towards things like your well-being, creative work, social justice, learning a new skill, or reaching a personal goal.
Let’s say you want to work with parts work (Internal Family Systems—IFS). You could dedicate January to working with a protector part that procrastinates to help you cope with overwhelm. This might look like:
If apps are more your style, here are some options for tracking:
- Happier App – Developed by Gretchen Rubin, this app helps build habits that promote happiness, health, and productivity.
- Habitica – A gamified habit-building app that treats real-life goals and habits like a role-playing game.
- Forest – Helps you stay focused by planting virtual trees that grow when you avoid distractions.
- AnyList – An organizational app for creating and sharing lists, reducing mental clutter.
Through practicing this ritual, I’ve learned that happiness isn’t about sweeping changes but small, consistent actions that shape how I feel and move through the world. Sometimes, I carry over similar Resolutions, etc. from month to month which helps me stay aligned with what matters. Some months, the X’s are plentiful and other months, the gaps are noticeable—but that’s part of the process: noticing patterns and gently getting back on track with intentional living. I know it’s March, but there’s no better time to join in and make some changes towards happiness for 2025.